One Thousand Days of Blessings: You Have Me (Day 393)

I finally had an afternoon to myself. I was lucky to find the restaurant mostly empty so my manager let me decide when I wanted to leave. I was out the door by 2:00. Coaching didn't start until 5:00 today so I was mulling over what I should do. There was clean my apartment since it's been neglected for almost three weeks now, read a book, go to the grocery store, and most likely more that I can't think of. And what did I decide to do... none of them. I instead got lost.

I'm not kidding when I said I got lost. I really did. Purposefully and with every intent I got lost. I used to do it quite often before life got in the way and gas prices rose to unseemly prices. A friend and I used to pass the time (avoid homework) by driving around and talking. We would keep talking and making random turn after turn until we would have no idea where in the world we were. That was when we'd open up the GPS on his phone and find our way home. The places we would find were exciting and sometimes breathtaking. You'd turn a corner and a hidden treasure would be there that none of our other friends had ever come across. We would sometimes spend three hours a day/night do this and those memories are some of my favorites.

Then there would be the times I would drive by myself. Since I was without a smart phone I had to make sure I remembered every turn I took but that didn't stop me from finding new sights. I would usually start on the same path every time and once that portion was memorized I'd add another turn. I did it so much I started knowing the roads and could find my way back by a different route because I had been on so many of them. These times alone gave me time to listen to my music, talk to God, and just figure things out.

So today, was the first time since moving to Tulsa that I went and got lost. Since I now have a smart phone I didn't have to remember my trip turn by turn. I just let myself take backroads until I hit a dead end and had to turn. I had my window rolled down and my music up. The air was crisp but not too cold where I started to shiver. I could see the earth starting to come back alive. Green grass was starting to show beneath the gray and brown turf, the horses were starting to shed their winter coats, the sky had a richer color of blue, and the sun felt more powerful. I somehow ended up down south in between Sapulpa and Glenpool. I then slowly made my way back home using every possible backroad I could find. I didn't have to use highway until I was north of 51st street.

During my drive I felt myself healing. Healing from the past strains and stress of the last few months. Healing from confusion, exhaustion, the constant moving. These past few weeks have been relentless and they have been rearing a side of me I haven't liked. This side has come to life because I haven't found time to praise and thank God. I've only had time to ask for more. I want this to happen, oh and I want that, oh and that.. wait this one little things as well. Today let me slow down and be reminded of what I should and am thankful for. It reminded me of the blessing I have even in my chaotic life and that striving is only good for so long. There must be times where I just say to God, "Thank you for where you have me."

And here are some of the pictures I've taken over the weeks.